Could you help this 15 yo boy make a decision?
Answer:
Good on you for turning your life around; that was brave and tough, and you sound like a great kid.
It sounds to me like you are happy and doing well with your grandmother, and settled into a new school away from the bad crowd.
I would stay with her until you finish your schooling. She is your family too, and I bet you love and help her just as much as she does you.
Your mother, father and sister are still part of your life, and you can stay with them on weekends and holidays.
you should live with who makes you feel good and doenst put you down all the time
Stay where you are doing well and don't feel depressed. Explain this to your family like you did here and they will hopefully understand. I'm so glad you turned your life around. GOOD JOB!!
Stay with your grandmother. It seems that she saved you from a horrible end, and going back to where it all began wouldn't be a safe or smart thing to do. You love your family, and it seems that they love you too, but staying away might be best for now. Maybe in the future, you'll feel ready to go back. Talk to your granmother and your parents, and you can all make up a solution to this problem.
They are your family. They are the ONLY ones who care about your best interests and well-being 100%, 24/7, 365 days a year. Nobody else on this planet has your back like that. You need to forgive and forget although I'm not sure what you need to forgive - maybe forgive yourself. Teenagers make mistakes and learn from them - it's in your programming. Don't make another mistake. It wouldn't hurt for you to get some counseling to move forward which is what you need to do, move forward.
When your parents punished you for the mistakes you made, they did it for your own good..What would have happened if they didnt step in? chances are you would probably be in jail or in some other mess..Yes they were hurt and very angry with you but that does not mean that they stopped loving you..Even if you do stay with your grandmother, you should forgive your parents, they only did what was best for you..
If you are doing well with your grandma, than stay with your grandma. Tell your parents you are doing so well there and would like to continue to go to school where you are. Go see them for summer and holidays but you should stay right where you are. Explain how happy it makes you too. Good job on turning your life around, make sure to help others too.
Talk to your grandmother and tell her what your feeling. You shouldn't write your parents off so easily. I suggest staying where you are for this school year and then maybe spending a couple of weeks with your parents next summer. But just for a vacation - once there you can judge if things would be a little better or not and since it's only for a 'vacation' you can return to your grand-mothers and think about where you want to go from there.
Everybody makes mistakes - even parents.
To err is human, but to forgive is divine!
In the end your lucky to have these choices but the final choice is still yours.
Good Luck
Wow. What a situation.
Good for you for cleaning up your act! Props for that!
What about going and spending a weekend here and there (like once a month or so) with the fam to see how it works? This way, you get time with your sister, but you can look forward to going back to your new life after a couple of days... OR, how about having your sister come visit you for a weekend?
Good luck! Follow your heart - it usually doesn't lie to you.
This is a really hard question. My best advice would be to live with your grandma until high school is over and then consider moving back. Your 15 like me so that would mean your in grade 10 as well? So that's only 3 years with your grandma. To sum this up, If you really think you are better off with your grandmother, it won't mess things up with your parents any more, and you'll be able to stay with her, do it. I think your parents should have been more supportive and that is just what your Grandma can do for you right now. I am sorry for what you had to go through and I congratulate you on succeeding! Good Luck!xo :)
You have already made your decision,You said that the one person that brought you back from your depression was your grand mother and she did not make you feel like you did not make mends for what you did. What I think is you still need to keep the comunications open with your parents and your sister, They do love you and they wish that you all could be a happy family again. Let them know the way you are feeling and that you are happy right where you are and that you wish to remain there. I think they would rather see you happy and getting good grades rather than see you depressed and miserable. I am not a consilor or anything but when someone as young as your self has felt depressed to the point of thinking about suicide then I would think that you should speak to a perfessional with your parents and grandmother by your side. You sound really grounded now and very happy, your past is edsactly what it is your past, as long as you have learned from it then you have achieved alot. You said that you want to live with who loves you, do you think that your parents are only proud of you because of your good grades and how you changed your life? Try to forgive them because as parents we want our children to grow up happy healthy and always feeling loved by use, talk to them and try to see where they are coming from, and if you don't want to speak to them then talk to your grandmother she will listen and give you her opinion, because you trust her . I wish you all the best in life and god bless you.
You are at an age where you can have this discussion with your family. Whether you relive your behavior is up to you. I've been in your shoes, and people (loved ones included) only do what you allow them to do to you. If you truly feel forgiven, nothing anyone does or says to you will make you feel guilt or upset you. Maybe you don't like to be reminded of how you used to be because it makes you feel bad.
The fact is, our behavior has consequences even when we do everything to make it right. Unfortunately, one of the longer lasting consequences is changing the way people view us. It may take years for people to stop seeing you in light of what you did. I can tell you this, the longer you take to go back and show everyone more of the new you, the longer it will take for them to forget the old you.
If you truly feel you aren't ready to face that and being with Grandma is better and not just an avoidance mechanism, then stay with Grandma. Just think about the fact that your family probably feels like they are being unjustly punished because they did what they needed to do when you weren't behaving and they don't get to experience the benefits now that you are.
You, your parents, your sister and your grandmother need a counselor.
Of course you think they were too harsh, you're a teenager.
Of course they think they know what's best, they're parents.
You are scared about reverting to your old life and every bad thing in it. That is normal to feel that way.
What ever you do, do not push your family away. Any of them. It may take a long time to see it, but eventually this will be water under the bridge. You'll all get over it. This will be that one thing in your life, that changed your life, that you will be able to pass on to your own children.
You want your parents to forgive you; you have to be willing to forgive. You also don't get to blame them for your actions. Own up to it. Get over it. Move on.
Perhaps you could start by spending a weekend with them and have some good quality family time. See how things go. Continue to do well with your new school and friends. You only have a couple of years left of school, but you have a lifetime with your family. I can't imagine Grandma approving of you cutting off your family. A woman who loves you and supports you the way she has would never tell you to do something that would destroy your life. If you trust her, talk to her and trust her words. She won't steer you wrong. She did raise one of your parents right? She knows what she is doing.
It may work out that you spend more time with your family and still get to stay with Grandm, for a while. Maybe you could talk to them about finishing the school year before making your decision. Respect them and they will respect you. Believe it or not they love you and want what is best for you. If staying where you are is what is best for you, then they will see that. You need to prove yourself in your words and in your actions. Show them that report card. Show them how you have matured. Let them meet these great new friends. Your previous lack of good judgement makes it hard for them to trust your judgement now. Prove it to them and prove it to yourself.
You guys can work this out if you work together.
Talk to them. I know that will be hard. You might be more comfortable doing it in a letter. Then you could meet afterwards to talk about it. Then you will be sure you get your side of things out without any interruptions. Tell them that you don't feel like you will ever be able to gain their trust and approval again. Tell them that you are afraid of leaving where you are because things are going so well and you don't want to mess that up. Tell them that you are finally back to being the guy you want to be, that they have always known you were deep inside, the guy they raised you to be. God Bless you honey...please don't loose this chance to make everything o.k. (not perfect, just o.k.)!
Definitely do what you think is best for you, which sounds like living with your grandmother. If your parents truly love you (which of course they do), then they will understand that you are doing what you feel is best for you. Just tell them that now that you are living with your grandmother, you really love your new school and have started a better life for yourself; they will be very pleased to hear that and understand that you don't want to start all over AGAIN. Good luck, and you should be EXTREMELY proud of yourself because it must be difficult to start anew.
If you don't want to go back to your parents then don't. if they're just going to bring you back down then it's not worth it. If they don't live too far away and you don't already, maybe you should get together with them every now and them, just to catch up, not to stay or anything. By the way, it sounds like you realy turned your life around, good on ya mate!
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