Single mom and the dad lives in another state?
I do, at least, want him to pay child support. However, he lives on the other side of the country. I just moved back to the east coast before this happened. How will I go about getting a paternity test and setting up child support? It's important to me that he helps at least monetarily, but he's so far away it makes me nervous.
Answer:
I'm 5 and 1/2 months pregnant and know exactly how you feel. I'm 21 years old and this will be my first child. The father became threatening when I was 3 months. If you really want this child you're doing the right thing because your safety if first!! I moved from Seattle back home to Maryland. They do have child support enforcement advocates that can help you in any state office. Try to keep his information current and they'll assist you in getting child support and a paternity test. I suggest going down to your states social services office and they'll tell you want needs to be done. I know you want that support from him and maybe in your remaining months he'll come around, but never underestimate his capabilities. Your and the baby's safety defiantly comes first. It's not easy going through pregnancy alone, but if you have support from family and even a counselor, it makes it a little easier. Hope that helps.
your local child support office should be able to help out with these questions you have regarding support.. good luck
Call Social Services, State attorney, Welfare office. He's being a Jerk. Don't get an abortion. Why are you nervous? Do you think he would hurt you or the child? He needs to accept responsibility. Good luck.
well sweetheart you dont have to put up with him dear you have to use your better judgement you never want to have and abortion that guy must be a royal asshole they ought to casterated the fool tell him that is the ******* he gets for the ******* he got i love you ladies very much and you dont have to put up with his garbage you can email me at haroldgardner6200@yahoo.com hon ok
Your like my mom, my mom is single and my dad say he will not talk care of the baby and he did " it " with 5 other girls so now I have 10 sis , 13 bros I am the big sis of the whole family
He's a player and that is wants all he wanted.If you are afraid he will harm you get a restraining order on him, you can get help getting child support. This kind of jerk won't pay anyway so think about it do you want this bum in your child's life? I would forget him raise my child my self without his help.
Amazing! Four years ago I was you. I cannot stress enough how important it is that you know that whatever you decide, you will be alright. The fact that he wants you to have an abortion means that, now, it isn't about him. You cannot even think about him right now. It's all about you and that baby and YOU taking care of him. In the off chance the daddy does do the right thing, let it be an extra blessing for you but do not expect a thing. Plan how YOU will be taking care of that baby. This answer would be too long if I really broke it down for you. I was 27 too, I can relate. The best advice I have for you, ma, is to give him your last name, don't worry about 'daddy' but let him know whenever he is ready to be a man you won't stand in the way, and take care of and love that baby. Get as much help and support from your family and friends possible. Being a single mom SUCKS and it's hard but there are a lot of us out here that are proof that it can be done. And the awards are phenomenal!
Why can't most women see that's why men support abortion? It's because it RELIEVES them from their responsibilities! Then they want to act as if it is their choice too! That's why women who support abortion are only giving more power to men.
To really answer your question, he had a choice...to NOT have sex. His choices are OVER. Don't worry about a thing. You will claim him as the father and your state will hunt him down and seek compensation for the state aid you recieved. They will even give him a paternity test. You will qualify for medicaid as a single mother...even if you get insurance through your work, you can use medicaid as a secondary and not even have to pay your co-pay or any % dental for your child. You may even qualify for food assistance (big help when your on one income) and don't forget to apply for charity from the hosptial if you find yourself with ANY bills. Single mothers who are on state aid will generally and automatically get any money due after insurance taken care of with the charity. Seriously, it's super expensive to raise a kid, so take all the advantages you can now, because later they might not be available.
I was in the same situation 13 years ago. First, give the baby your last name, Second, once the baby is born go to your local child support office and file for support. (let you ex ask for the paternity test..why should you have to pay for it?) Third, leave him alone and raise your child on your own and hopefully some day he will come around.
My ex left me when I was pregnant also and now 13 years later he wants to meet his child, he tells me how sorry he is for what he did to me and his child but I was not the one who lost out he was. I gave him his first born and now he has 6 other kids and let me tell you It gives me great satisfaction watching him create a bond with his child who really doesn't want anything to do with him. My ex is the one who has to answer all the questions of why didn't you want to be part of my life, didn't you love me? and why didn't you contact me sooner?
So my advice to you is enjoy your child, forget about your ex, and if he decides he wants to be a part of your child's life let him deal with your child questions don't make excuse for him.
Look first of all if you are not sure about your safety you should alway be looking over your shoulders that is not safe for you or your unborn now as far as getting help you can alway go to your local department of socisl services andtalk to someone there they will help you to find out how you can and will get you the support you need from that sorry a.. baby daddy you got and let them know that he act the way he do and trust me he will not touch you because you have let someone know about him and will know if something happen to you he will be the first person they are going to look for. There is help out there and just go to the police if he acts like he's going to hurt you PLEASE don't sleep on this cause it is so many of my sisters out here getting hurt or even killed by a sorry a.. man that don't want to live up to respondsibilities get the help you need TRUST ME the people at department of social service will help you to get the help you need and if they can't help ask them can they let you know who can. GOOD LUCK and GOD BLESS
go to your social servises.they will help you more then you think
I want to say that I applaud you in your decision to have this child. I do wish though that you did not have to spend so much time worrying about the child support issues. You need to concentrate on yourself. As for paternity tests and child support there are things you can do. You can contact the district attorney's office in the state and county that he is in and ask them to send you information on paternity testing, and support in their county. I am not telling you to go after the guy, just that it is always better to have the facts in front of you rather than not know. Most states will order child support orders and enforce them on behalf of the child. Just get your informed and take it one step at a time. You sound like a very strong woman and I wish you much happiness with your little one. Cherish and love him/her. They grow up fast.
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