To Mothers: When you had your first baby, what did you expect your husband to do or say?
Answer:
i thought it was really sweet when my husband bought me a necklace that had a mother and a baby on it... kind of in a heart shape... the two figures formed a heart.
it's VERY sweet to think of her feelings ahead of time... her emotions will be all over the place. BUT, you will never see a more loving woman than you see after the birth of her first child!
something else that i was very touched by with my husband was that he took a zillion pictures of me and the baby in the hospital. THEN he took them in for one hour processing and made a little album for himself to take into work... (that was 17 years ago).
one thing is for certain, she will remember EVERYTHING about this delivery, and what you did, and everything about the baby for the rest of her life. i can close my eyes and see it as if it happened yesterday. you NEVER get a chance to do this over... not even with a second child.
in my trip down memory lane i remembered how touched i was that my husband ran to the gift shop and bought the baby a gift shortly after their births... i was so touched to see the love he was capable of having for his new sons...
BEST OF WISHES AND CONGRATS on being such a thoughtful husband!
When the baby is born. Tell her that you love her and that you're very happy.
You shouldn't need to remember this, because you should feel it. It's a very emotional time. If it's a normal delivery, you'll be tired and spent. Things not to say while she's in the throes of labor:
"Come on, it can't hurt that much."
"Can't you push harder?"
"Don't you want to have another one soon?"
Just be close. Be sensitive. Ask her what she needs.
After the delivery, when you can get away, go buy her some beautiful flowers.
The next day, when she sees that her belly hasn't really gone down as much as she thought, tell her she's beautiful. Enjoy your baby. Bond with it.
Congratulations and good luck!
Say anything sweet or nice. A present would be great. Under no circumstances say 'My God! How did THAT fit in your fanny?!"
First of all, it's very sweet you are thinking about her and her needs.
This is advice from my personal experience. Don't laugh at her when she's having contractions. Be there. Do anything that would help ease her pain/discomfort (ie..washcloth on her forehead, holding her hand, staying right beside her encouraging her). Back her up. Talk about what she wants, what she doesn't want in the delivery room and every other aspect of it. When it comestime, it will most likely be your job to enforce these wishes.
I think that once you are in the situation you won't need any help coming up with things to say. My husband was great! He was here for me. Some women don't like to be touched while in labor. I'm the opposite. I needed him right next to me and would have him pat my back through each contraction. He was relaxed and so comforting. After our sons were born he was all smiles. I don't remember specific things he said but he stuck close by and made sure I had everything I needed. He was very attentive. And he did leave to get me flowers. :) But the most important part was just to have him there.
That's so sweet of you to ask! This alone shows that you have so much love and concern for your wife that I am sure you will do the right thing.
I think getting a present is an excellent idea -- some sort of keepsake to commemorate the birth. My husband got me one of those three stone pendants -- the three diamonds symbolized our new family; myself, my husband, and our new child. If you celebrate Christmas, you may also want to consider a special keepsake ornament for the tree of baby's first Christmas. Baccarat and Lenox make high-quality ornaments that are more special than your average Hallmark ornament.
Regarding what to say to her, your heart will know. Tell her you love her and you're thrilled about the life you created together. I'm sure you'll say the right thing when the time comes.
Congratulations again! Get all the sleep you can in the next month or so -- you're going to need it! :)
lol, your a sweet man! honestly you'll be SO wrapped up in the moment that ANYTHING that we say here will be a mumbled mess.
JUST LET IT BE!
enjoy the moment, and stop trying to over analyze it.
you will be there with your wife, and your new wonderful little bundle. TRUST ME...you'll know what to say.
just be there for her...and if you really want to know what she expects..ask HER!
she may not like some of the other suggestions on here that other like. everyone is different.
relax dad! you'll be fine!
"I love you and thank you" would be a nice treat for her. Tell her you love her and thank her for everyhing she's done. No need to shower her with presents a simple kiss and your presence will do.
Good luck and congratulations =)
she s lucky 2 get u..
soon after she delivers the baby, GIV HER A BIG KISS & SAY THAT U LOVE HER, & THT UL B WTH HER THE REST OF HER LIFE..
she l b the happiest, TRUST ME.
U CUD ALSO GET HER A GIFT..
after all bringing another life 2 this world isnt easy, after 10 months of continuous struggle..
all the best 2 both of u.
My husband got the baby a present and said I love you.
Play it by ear, every woman is different and they all react differently to labour and will need different things to get through it.
Don't be surprised if your wife turns into a screaming banshee and swears that she hates your guts and doesn't want you near her ever again - pain does weird and wonderful things to affect how we act! She may not want you to touch her, or she may cling to you desperately and need you close. It's impossible to forecast which will happen but you sould be equally prepared for both.
The most important thing you can do is to listen to your wife and react accordingly, respect her wishes (however bizarre they may seem at the time) and don't take things personally if she screams at you.
After the birth, make sure that you don't devote all of your attention to the baby, coo, cry and marvel at the experience but don't forget who has just endured x amount of hours worth of pain and suffering!
As for a gift, I wouldn't recommend getting her anything baby orientated - yes she is a mother but she is also your wife and it is important for you to acknowledge her as such. Many women feel as though they have lost a sense of self after having a baby and your wife will appreciate you recognising that she is still as attractive and alluring as she was before the pregnancy. I'd suggest getting her a gift certificate for a spa or a hairdressers that she can visit once she is feeling better and let her have a good pampering session.
Good luck and congratulations!
Just be there for her and be patient and understanding. A gift would be nice but I'm sure your attentiveness and love will be enough.
When my son was born I wasn't sure how my fiancee would react because he hasn't been around babies too much. I had a C-section and he did everything with our son since I would too drugged to do it. It was beautiful to watch him take care of him like he had been a father for years. I fell in love with him even more in the days after our son was born.
Good luck to you.
My advice get your man to wait outside the delivery room have your mom or his mom with you. And yes get her something that's sweet I wish I had thought of that.( the only reason i say have your man wait outside is cause some men react differently to what they see and it's not a pretty sight of coarse if he thinks he can handle it the more power to him)Congratulations!
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