How long after giving birth was it before you had sex again, and why?
Answer:
Being a man, I might not fully understand your apprehensions and thoughts. We had our child 6 months back and I saw a similar situation in my home. At this stage I have a 2-point strategy to get you over this difficult stage:
Step 1: Discuss this with your partner. Men unfortunately absorb only as much as they are told. Very scarcely do they delve beyond the spoken word. Hence your silence may have an entirely different connotation to him. It'll be twice more difficult to get him back once he strays off.
Step 2: Set the right expectations between the two of you. For instance; "lets flirt but not expect full-fledged-steamy-session" until both are willing and comfortable. I can vouch from 1st hand experience that this works wonders.
As long as you are mentally prepared (and allowed) to dis-engage anytime, you'll play along - a wee bit more each time...and finally all the way at some point.
We got firing on all cylinders within 3 weeks of trying this technique. ALL THE BEST.
Right after the 6 week check up! 4 Months is a long time, Take is slowly but there is nothing to be scared of!
I think I tried at about 3 months and then again each month for a while but didn't begin enjoying it again until after a year. It was hard for me to have sex again because I had 4th degree tears and I was very tense. It was more psychological than physical after a few months obviously because I had healed but doing some research I found many women who felt the same way. Also, all my energy was going towards my baby and I didn't desire sex for a long while.
6 or 7 weeks after, once i had my check up and had stopped bleeding. i was fine.
for you to wait 4 months is not right, book yourself an appointment with your G.P. and find out what the problem is you may need counselling.
After my second baby - 1 week believe it or not ! I think I was very lucky in that my bleeding stopped so quick and I felt great. Try not to worry too much - it'll just make you tense and give more problems. It'll happen for you, everyone is different xx
I agree with raine.
as soon as the bleeding stopped!! i went right off it during prenancy, and made up for it afterward! i was sooo needing it!
it was about 6 weeks. you need to keep trying it will get better. theres nothing to be scared of. you will find that if you keep trying things will happen naturally.
well I had a c section so my tummy was kinda sore for awile but not other places, it was still about 2-3 months for me, I didn't feel attractive or really feel like sex after the baby. Nothing to do with my husband, just me, I'm not sure why, just felt blah about my body I guess. it's ok you feel this way it's completly normal.
Don't thumbs down this it's true and also valid:
My mate and his missus had twins. 1 year later she still wouldn't put out for some internal mind issue that men will never understand.
He went out and started getting it somewhere else, massage parlours at first, then dogging and meeting swingers.
My point being, make sure you talk about it to your partner, explain how you feel and all that liberal crap or you may be on the receiving end of a nasty surprise in the future.
about a month i had stitches thought they were gonna rip open
After my first child it was three weeks, after my second five days.
With my first I was a bit scared, with my second I was really hot for my man, but I made him use a condom at first I can't explain why. Four months is a long time for your mate to go without sex, try to examine yourself, I understand you are probably tired, full of hormones and added responsibility but you had your relationship with your mate first and sex is a great way to give him the affection that he needs. If you can't pin point what it is stopping you from intimacy ask your gyny for a referral to someone to talk to.
about 4 months - because i felt like it, but not since :( hormones are all over, and babies are knackering! read a magasine article that said a really high percentage of women dont have sex for a year afterwards, which seems a bit long to me?
I understand it hurts (at least it did for me) it took a few months before it didn't hurt.
for me it was only about 3 week with my first and about 1 week after my second, i never had stictches and felt great. but i can understand if you are sore and had stiches , and because they are prone to infection maybe best to wait the full 6 weeks, but hey remember your man has needs to, so dont make him wait too long , we are all human ( believe it or not)
i would rather of never had sex again lol but my partner at the time kept going on at me,so i just waited till my stitch's were out an i stopped bleeding which was bout 6weeks
after 10 weeks or 2 months and half.
I had an episiotomy, the area still numb and there still pain. It will be difficult at first but after a while it will be okay. Sometimes it is psychologically, a trauma when you gave birth..Just go on and keep on trying and everything will be okay..
Having a baby also sometimes lose the libido or the interest of having sex because of the energy you are giving to your baby.
They say wait 6 wks, this is for your body to heal itself inside and get back to normal with the hormones etc. Go and talk to the nurses who looked after you during pregnancy, if you can. You don't say what your birth or labour was like. If it was a bad one it may be fear of getting pregnant again thats putting you off. Talk to your bloke, explain how you feel to him, start with the kissing and groping first and take it from there. Stop when you feel you've gone far enough or carry on if those sexy feelings come back! Go at your own pace but don't just say no to your bloke, explain how you feel to him. Don't forget, he helped make the baby but he didn't give birth so doesn't know how you felt about it. Relax a little, enjoy the baby, enjoy your man and the feelings will come back. I've been thru it 3 times and always got there in the end. Good luck!
I think I waited till my baby was about 3 or 4 months. I waited this long mainly because I had stitches and was petrified that it was going to hurt me (and I was right!!) plus I was just too tired to even think about sex. I also bleed for nearly 8 weeks after I had the baby. It was hard for my husband, but after biting his head a couple of times he stopped asking me and said to let him know when I was ready.
8 months on we are back to normal now in the bedroom!
I have 5 children with my first four it was in and around my 6 week check up. with my fifth it was 2 days after delivery! we had no condoms but I insisted must have been a rush of hormones! well the next morning I convinced myself I was pregnant again panicked and headed of to the doc for the morning after pill. you should have seen his face! he called another doc in who then called a lady doc in and the three of them stood discussing my reguest while I wanted the floor to open up and swallow me!! It was decided that it was physically impossible for me to be pregnant so soon after delivery so I was refused! I will never forget it.
So in answer to you Q just have sex when you feel like it every body is diff with my 2nd I did have sex after 5-6 weeks but I didnt feel up to it again for another 4-5 months!!
It takes a while to get the old sensations back.and you need to work on the muscles down there or your may not even know your husband is inside you! (but blame the size of his dick...I do!)
I had sex a fortnight after i had my son, we used a condom but it split and suprise suprise i got pregnant, The baby was due exactly 40 weeks after my son was born, unfortunately i lost the baby but a lesson was learnt, you are SO SO SO fetile after birth. DOnt do it until your ready, you will only resent it.
hi there, mines been 4 years, since i have my 2 children iv gone off sex.. not sure why. maybe because i suffer with aniexty. You may suffer with alittle postnal depression but you are not aware of it. when you have kids that is all you can think about especially at a very young age. maybe that has something to do with it. do not panic though its very normal your sex drive will come back eventually dont rush it or worry about it. as it will take longer. hope this helps
About a week after giving birth, i felt so horny all the way through my pregnancy and just after giving birth! Dont be scared i had an episiotomy and stitches and they were a little sore the first time but they were fine after a few weeks!
You need to plan a romantic evening and have a few drinks, relax and then some magic might happen! Get a sitter for the night so there are no distractions.
Good Luck xxx
it was about 3 weeks after giving birth I had torn quite badly and was sore but it was fine my husband was very gentle and it was very sensous I would go so far as to say it was the best sex I have ever had.
when you are ready hun you will know! and only try when the time feels right Any man worth his weight in gold will understand and there are plenty of other ways for you two to enjoy yourself. Congrats on the baby and good luck x
well they tell you after your 6 week check up...I had a c section and I waited 3 weeks which i know is not the norm...but 4 months is a long time maybe you should discuss your fears with your partner and your doctor
it was prob about 3 weeks, luckily my bleeding stopped quite quickly. i was nervous and it was a bit different but that was prob because i was a bit nervous. everything was fine though. don't feel pressure into it though, you'll feel ready when you are ready. keep talking to your partner though.
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