Eight year old wont sleep by herself?
Answer:
Is she maybe afraid, but embarassed to say so? If the other kids want to share a room with her. Great! If they don't. I suggest that rather than letting her join them in their room or you in your... someone join her in her room for a while just until she falls asleep. This way she gets used to falling asleep in her own bed. If you have tried all this and have talked to her to make sure there isn't a problem and you really want to break the habit, you may need to be firm in making her go to bed at a set time and stay there. It isn't cruel or unkind to be the authority figure. You are offering her a comfortable bed and her own room. You've tried night lights. You've offered comfort. You and the other kids have a right to go to bed alone if you want to. Sometimes you have to use tough love for a child's own good. Don't feel guilty if it comes to that. Offer comfort... but be firm.
Presence of another may offer her mental security .. these are scary times for children when they see and hear of so much happening the world over..be patient.
If possible, allow her to share a room until this need has passed or present to her that another is just directly nearby.
How old are the siblings? It might not be a bad idea to have them share a room together. My two sisters who were 6 years apart did it for 12 years and still occasionally when the older one comes back from college.
You need to have a serious talk with her. Something is bothering her and making her scared.
The best way to talk about it is bring it up during the day, when whatever it is won't seem as scary. She might be having nightmares, there could be scary shapes on her wall (happened to my friend's daughter - it was a rose bush outside.) Tell her that it's ok to be scared, and that you can't help her until she tells you.
If she still can't talk about it, ask her to draw some pictures. Ask her what it looks like in her room at night, what her dreams look like, etc.
I recommend rearranging the kids rooms so one is a sleep room (where they all sleep) and the other is a play room. But, if letting her sleep in the same room as her siblings is not an viable option for you...
You should go to her room at bedtime and stay with her until she falls asleep and then check on her periodically. Let her know that you will be looking in on her from time to time.
This is an age, where kids can be frightened of nightmares, or even scary movies could leave them on edge and afraid to sleep! I myself when I was about the same age, had the same problem! The best thing you can do for her to get her over this, is to tell her that everything will be alright when she falls asleep, and if she should for some reason be afraid of something, that you will be there to help her through it! Just her knowing that she can count on you, will ease her fears. Her fears and anxiety will only be worse, if she is also afraid to confide in you, and ask for your help! Once she knows she can tell you her problems, and you offer your help, she will sleep more sound, and feel more secure!
Ok ...you as a mother need to be consistent..From the time she said she could not sleep which is who knows when, you should have used positive reinforcement. you did not so now ..you have a big problem on your hands. Don't give in. ( i bet you did) stop doing that!
You must let her sleep in her room and tell her that big girls sleep in their own rooms. or she will end up not having a room of her own.
it's clearly not her fault at all. it's YOU mom..you are giving in and spoiling her..
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