My cousin has a foster child really out of control please?
Answer:
Talk to him and explain the negative consequences of his behavior.
Withhold treats, privileges, etc.
Give him time out.
Pray with and for him.
Give him lots of love, positive strokes, rewards, etc.
Ask God for wisdom and direction in his training .
I would consult a Behavioral Specialist, possibly child is Hyper-active, but there may be some other problem at work. Professional assistence is definitely indicated.
a child out of foster care has alott of problem's so you first need to under stand what they been throw spanking a child like that is not going to solve any thing you could get help though the state for canceling
A child in foster care can only be punished by time outs. If they find out differant, they will take him out of the home. Might try the time out thing which I have had not luck with, or you might try taking away toys until they can show better behavior and award them for good behavior ie. a movie or a present.
My aunt and uncle have foster children and every one of them came from horrible back grounds, abusive parents, drugs, etc. There was only one time in the last 15 years that they could not control a child and they sent her back. I felt sorry for the girl, she was 12 and completely out of control. The minute they picked her up she started cursing them and told them the minute there back was turned she would run away. They had to think of the damage she could do to the much younger children they had in the home.
Hello he's a "foster" child. This tells me this child has probably been through some pretty bad times. I would suggest getting him into counseling. There's a lot in his head that he needs help dealing with and do to all that, he may not be able how to deal with it.
Hi
Former foster parent/social worker here.
There is a big difference between "punishment" and "discipline" and it is useful for parents to learn about effective discipline in dealing with kids who have been bounced around in their early lives, and who often are so hurt and discouraged that they will look to "revenge" themselves on the poor foster parents who are seeking to help them.
The best way I know to learn about effective discipline is to join a parent support group-- your cousin should ask her social worker where such a thing might be located. If there aren't any-- or no appropriate ones-- then she might want to suggest to the social worker that he/she look into getting one set up in your neighborhood. When parents come together with someone who is trained in this field, the synergy is often magnificent and everyone benefits from the sharing of skills, the ease of stress, the occasional trading-off of child minding, and the overall learning that goes on.
If there are absolutely no parenting groups for support, I would suggest that she does some of her own education and advocacy training. Foster parents are by and large, big-hearted folks who care about children, but quite often there are frustrations and "issues" that are just too much for most people to deal with and not be ineffective or hurtful to the hurting child in their care. To all foster parents out there: go for the most professional development you can find. tomorrow's generation of parents are in your care today.
Merry Christmas!
HealthiaCynthia
Certified Comprehensive Coach
Moderator for My Monday Miracles
http://ca.groups.yahoo.com/group/my_mond...
your cousin should have received training on this when she took her initial foster parent training. If this is inadequate, she can probably find more training on disciplining difficult children without spanking them. You might even be able to take the classes too, which are often free, if you are providing her with childcare.
I recently a substitute teacher for special education. These are children that a spanking probably would not phase them. Their method for punishment was a called the sad chair. It was a chair away from everything with a sad picture on the wall and the child was required to sit there for two minutes after they calmed down. You would probably have to sit and hold him there the first few times but after wards he hopefully would realize this is not some where he wants to be and would rethink his actions.
I was amazed that the disabilities didn't limit the child's ability to know what the sad chair was all about.
I agree with the support group ideas. What you mostly need to do is be consistent. Children in foster care grow up with lots of different rules and different temperments. They are going to keep pushing the line until they understand where it stops. It's going to take a lot of trying, but they need to trust that when you say something it's going to happen, good or bad. It's a trust issue with children who have been moved around a lot.
well you could take him to his room and let him stay there until he obeys and if he still doesnt listen to it again and again until he does
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