What would you do? *Sensitive Topic*?
Problem is I don't want him to use it in front of me. But, once I start watching his daughter I know it will be an issue. And, with the way my son repeats whatever you say I know he'd use it at the most inappropriate time!
What would you do if your child said the word in public? How would you handle the situation...especially if there was an African American looking at you like you were a racist?
Answer:
Me personally I would appoligize to the african american and let him know that you will take care of it. He will accept that if he is a good person. I also would try to talk to your son ahead about using this word and that it will not be tolerated.This is not a nice name. Remind him how it feels when someone calls you a name.
I've looked after other peoples' kids for many years, and we've encountered all kinds of value systems.
In a case like this, where it is a really "not OK" deal, I'd say "At our house, we don't use that word".
Then if the Dad says it, I'd give him the same line.
Unless the guy's been living in a cave somewhere, he knows it's socially unacceptable.
If your kid says the word in public, I'd correct him the same way you do at home. Later, in my own house, I'd explain to my child how hurtful that can be and why s/he should NEVER say it again.
WTG for being a caring Mom!
Good Luck
i have a friend that does that and i told him i was like i dont like that word and you have no right saying it but if your gonna say it DONT say it around me
thats what i do and now he watches what he says
have you broached the subject with him? Told him that you really feel uncomfortable with him using that term and worry about his daughter overhearing and repeating it? It's an awkward conversation, but worth having, maybe he doesn't even realize it is so offensive and unnacceptable, or that he could get child services on his tail if his daughter uses it.
If anyone used that word in front of me, I would ask them not to say such things, if my kids were around to overhear, I'd ask the person to apologize for using a bad word. My kids will know it's not acceptable.
Just politely ask him if he would not use the word around your son.
You have to make your stand, and remain firm. Tell him outright, with no apologies, that you find the word offensive and insulting, and you do not want that word used. If he refuses to stop, then walk away. It is hard, I know, but you want to keep your son from picking up the bad habit.
Apologize for your child. Then sit down and explain to him that that word is not acceptable to you and you don't want him to say it anymore. Explain that it hurts peoples feelings when he says that. As for you sisters kid, explain to her that, that word is not to be said in your house and also explain that to your brother in law. He can say what he wants outside of your house.
LOL i moved to a 98% black neighborhood it took time for them to get use to me . My son which is 4 years old and he uses the "n" word .One day my Friends in the the hood came over my son said :what up "n" : I thought OH NO this is it there is 4 of them and one of me well they just started doing the hand slap thing .
Its not what you say its how you say it .Real hard to explain but there is a certain way to say the "n" word being that I'm around blacks allot i have the slang down and they call me "n" now and i say the same to them. I'm one of the brothers now and only the brothers can say that .So i wouldn't let it bother you that one of my brothers in law is saying the "n" word .Its almost like the word know and no. Well no is no or is it know .
Anyway tell my brother the hood is good and be careful out there in the white mans world its a jungle
lol you guys kind of remind me of the prince of bell air but a white version.
First I had a friend ever since high school she would say racist jokes and she would think its funny it is not it is not appropriate and you must ask him politely not to talk that in front of your child it will not teach proper ways.
Well, I'm a white girl that grew up in the projects yet I am still intelligent enough to realize that this in unappropriate! I would just wait until your brother in law says the word in front of you or your son and confront him with it at that moment. Also have a talk with your son about how that is not a nice word and he is not to ever say it.
i would apologize to them and go home with my child. when i got home i would explain to them why it is important not to ever say that word again because it is very bad and hurts people's feelings.
I'd handle it the way I'd handle any other wrong word my child said - to explain firmly why it was wrong and what it meant [within reason, okay! but this one you will be able to explain]. If there was someone nearby who would be offended, then you should tell the person that your son overheard the word and does not mean to be offensive but that you will deal with it at home.
I would sit down with my child and explain that uncle Tom uses words that necessarily nice and how we are all the same and that it isnt nice to call people names because they are a different color. We are all the same, just in different colors and that one color is not better than the other.
I would talk to him about it before it happens .
The problem is that YOU can't tell him how to raise his daughter. I'd decline watching his daughter and ask him to find someone else to watch her. As far as what would I do if my child said that word...it wouldn't happen becuase that word has never been spoken in her presence. At 21 she knows what the word is but has never said it in her life.
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