Parenting question number 2 for the day. 8 year old with clothing?
I have a problem with his clothing and what he insists on wearing. He has a fair to middlin' warddrobe and to purchase lots more clothing to his desire and liking is not a possibility right now.
You see he insists on wearing the same clothes every day. He is really into dress shirts, which at his age I think is neat, but he wears the same shirt 2 sometimes three days in a row, or at least he tries to.
I have made it clear to him that this is poor hygiene and there is a rule he cant wear them, his clothes are dirty when he comes home every day. The big problem is he flips out about this every day. Says he's going to run away from home and that I "hate" him because I wont let him wear the same clothes every. I'm firm with my rules about it and just recently i decided for a few days i'd help him pick out clothes. its not helping at all. Hints?
Answer:
If he is getting serious about the fashion thing, it's time to get serious about the responsibility thing. I see two possibilities. Either he buys some more shirts with allowance money or chore money ( you need to give him the opportunity to earn the money ) or, if you have a washing machine accessable in a safe place for him, he learns to do a small laundry of his clothing of the day after he comes home from school.
He might have OCD and you need to take him to the doctor and tell him what is going on there are meds for things like that out there.
If he is too stubborn about wearing the same shirt over and over again.
Always buy two shirts the same kind. When he comes home and takes it off, the next day he wears the other shirt and he doesnt know the difference.
Teach him how to wash his clothes. Then he can wash them every night if he wants to. Also find out WHY he does this or why he doesn't want to wear his other clothes. Maybe explain that the other kids will notice he is wearing the same clothes and start rumors.
If purchases more is out of the question, then why not allow him to wear these shirts on the condition that when he comes home, he must change into something else and HE wash the shirt out.
Could you go and pick new clothes w/ him and the ones he likes the BEST pick different colors of the same set.. that might help you out during the week and that way there is no excuse for him not wear them, they are the same, just different colors.
Good luck, and don't worry boys are bad that way.. My son who is now 14 wore the same Michael Jordan Jersey for days at a time, the minute it came out of the dryer on it went.. I told him he had to wear an under shirt.. it was bad.. but hey.. we made it..
You'll see it will be funny in a few years ;-)
Shop at thrift shops and find a few more shirts/slacks that he is comfortable with.
Goodwill has childrens clothes cheap as well as Salvationarmy.
I would also inquire with Grandparents and family about the situation, holidays are comming and they may be able to help with a new shirt or two.
In the mean time yes, still insist that he use each item only one day and change. If he wants to wear it again, he will need to change into P'Js and wash it before the next day.
It's pretty common for a younger child to want to wear the same clothes every day, but he should be old enough to get that it's not clean now.
If he likes dress shirts so much, does he have enough for a full week of school? Can you sit down with him on Sunday and have him plan out what he wants to wear to school all week? Have him put together 5 outfits and assign an outfit to each day ahead of time and then make him stick with it.
If he doesn't have 5 dress shirts, can you find some way to compromise? Maybe go to a thrift store to pick up a couple more shirts cheaply? Show him how to help with his laundry every 3 days if he only has 3 shirts?
I have somewhat the same issue with my 15 yr old daughter. She has her favorite clothes that she wants to wear all the time.
I understand the hygiene issue and all but sometimes you just have to pick your battles. let him wear what he wants. Believe me, the first time a peer makes a comment about how dirty he looks or a girl tells him he stinks, he will change more often.
There are bigger issues to worry about than what he wishes to wear to school. JMHO.
If you have the money go to the good will and pick up half dozen dress shirts and tell him there is one for each day.My son got a shirt there and for months and months that was the only shirt he would put on when we went out with family ,or out to dinner. I let him because i knew after a while he would be over that shirt and on to something else.He has and like people allways say "dont sweat the small stuff",its only a shirt.He sounds like a good kid ,so let him have the shirts.
Let him wear it. Once he starts stinking and the other kids pick on him about it he will change his tune. Sometimes kids have to learn the hard way because they think they are right all the time.
I did this when I was around 7-8, it was because there was a boy who made a comment about liking that outfit, so I wanted to wear it everyday so he would notice me. My parents wanted to teach me why we don't wear clothes day after day, so they let me so I would learn for myself.
you know what happened, at the end of the week, the boy quit noticing the outfit, and started staying away from me, when I came to school with a different outfit on, he paid attention to me again.
Could be trying to impress a girl. Let him wear the shirt, and let his friends show him why we don't do that. It sure worked for me.
Now my daughter doesn't have that problem, she goes to a school with a uniform and so it looks like she is wearing the same clothes every day but she isn;t
Kids love charts! Make a chart to hang in his room labeled Mon- Friday. On Sunday night have him pick his 5 favorite shirts out of his closet and let him choose which day of the week he wants to wear each shirt. Each day that he chooses a new shirt reward him with a sticker to put on the chart. If he insists on wearing the same shirt two days in a row, let him, but he won't get a sticker. Tell him when the month is over, he can have a quarter for each sticker on the chart and he can use his quarters to buy something new for himself, ie. a toy or a new shirt.
you are his mother you need to set down the rules. A five year old shouldn't have the say in his wardrobe. You have the final say and if he throws a fit you need to punish him.
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