12 Year Old Attitude Problem?
Answer:
he's exerting his authority on u because he knows u love him unconditionally and are probably closer to him than his dad, he is trying out for the real world, my sons 14 and i had a similiar problem, i wanted to smash his face in at times, an i've never smacked him...my advice is to ignore him as much as possible, and ask him to be civil, i used to get into bed with my son in the morning for a wee cuddle and ask him how he was etc and give him plenty of cuddles and kisses, he should respond to u, tell him how much he is hurting u and his sister, explain about him being an example to his sister. maybe do some mum and son stuff, no dad or sister and get close to him again. he is a manchild, too old for babying and too young for adult treatment, but deep inside he is still a wee boy, still unsure, he wants to be 'one of the guys', his dads tiger/sport, his sisters idol and your loving son, problem is, its all too much for him and he's resentful of all the emotions he is experiencing...he'll grow out of it, my son is coming outta it now.sorry to make u gasp "2 years"? but it does get better, little by little...ps the girl will be worse lol x
Aw man, I'm sorry - welcome to puberty.
wash is mouth with soap, and stop trying to be his friend, he didnt get this way overnight...
strong, firm discipline!
Just wait it out.
YEP...welcome to puberty. All you can do is instill in him that you are the boss. Ground him every time he talks back to you. After missing out on some events that he REALLY wants to do/see, he'll calm down. GOOOOOOOOOD LUCK =)
All I can tell you is that you are not alone - you have just described my son and his nasty attitude with me and his sister. He will be 12 on Wednesday and I look forward to seeing what kind of answers you get. I wish I could give you some advice, but right now - the most peaceful times in my home are when my son is at his dads.
Sounds like your son has issues with women. My lil cuz has issues when he was younger. Growing up, his father treated his mother very poorly. He learned from him and gave his mother no respect. He would also disrespect his female teachers. His father had no respect for women and in turn showed his son the same respect. I would suggest counseling to find out what the problem is. Good Luck.
I'm a dad of a young person similar in age. I have found that my kids respect me more then their mother I believe the reason for this is I will Whoop their little butts in a second one warning. I don't tell them a second time with words .
Both you and your husband should confront him and tell him that you both will have ZERO tolerance for his behavior. Don't give him an inch or he will take a mile. As one reader commented. " welcome to puberty " Good luck and God bless.
This is tough as most teenagers go through that "I'm smarter than you". Maybe you should have him prove it.
I think he will only continue to show attitude towards you if you let him. Put him in his place and remind him who is boss. Ground him for disrespect. Take away the internet, cell phone, phone, tv, friends for a few days and toss him a book to read (a thick one). And when he completes it ask if he would like to read another one.
Welcome to puberty. He'll grow out of it one day...but it probably just started so there's a long way to go. Teenagers are full of anger and he's at least expressing that anger by being rude to you...so he's not storing it up, stressed out and even get worse in the future. He's lucky to be able to do that...I wasn't allowed to when I was his age.
All you can probably do is to support him as much as you can, be there for him when he needs you and try not to tell him to what to do as much. Let him prove that he's right, let him taste the feeling of him being wrong...that'll teach him a lesson without any of your effort. Just wait, be patient...he'll grow out of it eventually!
Good luck and I hope things will get better for you. Take care!
First off, don't go nuts. Second off, he's a preteen, so you haven't seen the worst of it yet. Third, from what you've said, I think you and your husband are separated, so maybe you or your husband are being negative about the other to the kids, and you want to break that habit because it can affect the kids a lot. Also, kids at this age think they know everything, and he's starting to move away from you socially, so maybe you should give him more space, but at the same time, give him more responsibility. Maybe you are treating him too much like a child (I know 12 still is a kid, but he doesn't know that). If he is doing something really wrong, you need to get tough and set up some kind of heavy duty punishment, but I doubt it's that much of a problem yet. I hope this helps, thanks for reading, and God bless you and yours.
What the f*ck? You don't let your child stand up to you. Whoop his *ss. Or you can say, "I'm gonna tell your father."
Then he'll get scared and probably crap his pants.
I know it aint cool these days but my parents would smack me, I have grown to be a well rounded polite individual. As long as you don't break anything, I don't see a problem with it. When I think of the way I acted as a child I thank God my parents had the sense to show me who was boss. Children without guidance are the biggest problem we have in society today. I have never had to with my children I am lucky they are so good natured but when I was a kid I needed it and clearly would have spiraled out of control without it. Thanks mom and dad
Well you said that he doesn't get the big of an attitude with your husband I think you should have him talk to his dad about that and if that doesn't work I think you should see if you can find something else so
I hate when I see parents go through things like this. My boyfriend is an older man and he has 3 children, one aged 5, 4 and one that's 11. The younger kids are spoiled as heck and they tell both of their parents "NO!" I don't like that they can get away with it, but at the same time, I'm the girlfriend and I don't have children and don't think that my voice matters. The oldest, is at the point where she's going to start her voyage into becoming a woman. So she's moody, she's also spoiled as heck and has a bad attitude sometimes. Overall they're great kids, I think you have to find the time to sit down and really talk with him. You are, after-all, his mother. Let him know that. It's not illegal to talk to him and you have the right to say where he can go and what he can do. The issue with not having an attitude with his father might be that his father needs to talk to him. He hasn't been shown how to show respect to his mother, or his sister, does he respect any female? Maybe dad needs to sit down and talk to him about respect. You might be the woman in his father's life, you are the mother of his children. If you and his father are not romantically involved, he still needs to know that his mother is a woman and he should respect women, just like he would any other person. You know this already, but that means so much and if his father shows him that this is right now, then I think you'll be okay in the future. And just work with him on it, I think. It sounds like a plan to me. I don't know, good luck though. Maybe if you both, tackle this issue he will grow out of this potentially abusive behavior. This sounds alot like how my brother is. Good luck with this.
I think most of the answeres you have received up till now are very good ones, I would just add that you should make sure dad is involved every time you disipline weather it be grounding him or whooping his butt. Let him see that there is going to be a united front against him every time he is disrespectful. I am sure he will grow out of this and you will do fine.
sounds familiar, try suggesting a local martial arts school, if u can get him interested and he thinks its his idea the attitude should disappear very quickly. Maybe start by taking your daughter along to some lessons perhaps he will follow our show an interest. Theres no better place for cocky young kids to learn courtesy and respect very quickly, if all else fails stand back and wait till hes 18 before u try to communicate with him again, by then he should have learnt to appreciate his mum. Good luck.
ask him whats bothering him?? ask if you did something that makes him act like this to you?? open up to your son thats the best way.tell him whats on your mind...good luck
Im in your boat- I have 13 yr old daughter that is the same way...we take technology from her first and that never seems to be enough anymore, so I took her door off the hinges!! Guess what- it worked for awhile anyway. When a teen loses privacy of their "sanctuary" it seems that they decide they might as well make an effort to get along with other household members.good luck
This is the way boys act when they are going through puberty. They act this way against their moms and sisters. Puberty is such a hard time on boys. Just find a medium between being patient and being firm with him.
I would say be more aggressive and scare him, that is why he won't confront his dad, that's why i don't confront my dad because im scared of him. But with my mum it's different
take him to te doctor to see if he has hit puberty. if he has hair downthere it's normal but otherwise see a pyciatrist
what you need to do is to scare his little butt into behaving. you can do this by taking him to juvenile hall and have them show him what happens to kids and young adults who have the same attitude that he has and that is where he is going to be if he does not change. this should wake him up quite a bit. it is tough love and sometimes that is what a child needs when this kind of things happen. hope this helps. good luck.
he just starting puerty get use to it
Well, if he has more respect for his father than he dose you then may-be it's time you and your husband have a sit down talk with him. Because come to think about it his getting at that age where he thinks he's old enough to where he doesn't have to lesson to his mom anymore. So best thing I can tell you is for you and your husband to just have a sit down talk with your son.
you shouldn't be afraid you should show him you are his mum and you deserve some respect
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