Help with my 6 yr old daughter? Having problems in school...?
Thanks to those who have something helpful to say!
All those who just want to be mean, go away!!
Answer:
I'm a single mom with 5 kids, and a former preschool teacher for over 6 years. I have a diploma as an early childhood specialist, and have taken extensive classes on disciplinary concerns and behavioral issues.
I believe that your daughter, for the most part, is seeking attention. Good or bad, kids don't care as long as they get noticed. So here's what I would suggest. Stop with the rewards for "good" behavior. Because it isn't so much good as it is just not bad. By giving her treats for doing something everyone else is expected to do, you are reinforcing that she will get her way by acting poorly. Instead, make the "reward" be something possitive, like a high-five, or a hug. Be sure to praise her when she does anything good, because then she will start focusing on those types of behaviors instead of the negative ones.
Social development is tricky. There is a chance that she is acting poorly because she hasn't yet learned how to join in to a group already playing. Set up play dates if possible, or try acting things out at home of the proper way to join in, or asking others if they would like to play with her.
Ask her to be a helper at home, setting the table or helping prepare the food. This will give her a sence of importance and accomplishment which will give her a boost in self-esteem, as well as some quality time with you, which is the kind of attention she should want to be getting.
Ask the teacher if they will allow her to be a "special helper" and assist other kids with things. This worked wonders for my oldest child. It helps send the other children to her instead of her feeling as if she needs to seek them out. And again, if she's a "special helper" she is doing something positive and will most likely be thanked for it, which is going to help with her esteem, and re-enforce good behavior all at the same time.
If you need any more advice or ideas you can IM me @ kat_021776
well show her wat happens to people who steal there may be a movie probaly is . if she does it again take away one of her fav things it worked for me. she may act like that to get attention or she may she others do that.
It sounds like you have been doing what you can to stem this problem. Her low self esteem may be the result of some type of mental disorder and I would reccomend that she get a complete physical to rule out things. She may be in need of counseling as children at her age are open more to authority figures.
I hope this works, try praising her more when she does good things and try to give her more one on one attention. Also make sure that she doesn't have a learning problem. When I was in kindergarten, I had behavior problems due to a combination of learning difficulties and lack of attention ( my parents both worked full time and my g-ma who babysat me didn't really care to be bothered with me). To me I felt better about myself when I got in trouble/ it was fun and I got plenty of attention. Thank you for being a good mom and looking for help in this matter.
When I was a kid I had a problem with taking things also, my mom took my butt to the police station, found the biggest, scariest looking policeman she could and had him come out and talk to me about stealing and what can happen if I continue.. well let me tell you that after I quit crying and changed into dry britches, I never stole anything ever again!
My heart goes out to you on this one.
I am a mother of two boy and a girl,they are now adults.
I did not mess them up too bad so I feel I can advise on some problems.Taking things was easy for me with my son, I marched him back into the store and told on him. He was so shocked that I did that he never again took any thing. As for the self esteem . I know only one thing it is the saddest day in a mother life. All you can do is let your kids know they may not feel important but to you and others in the family they are very important. I can say one day she may grow out of it but my daughter still has trouble feeling she really matters. This is a beautiful young women that got two degrees with a kid on her hip and she did it by her self.I believe her to be the strongest women I know and truly beautiful inside and out. A great mother and daughter but more than that a friend I hope you the best.
Sorry this sounds harsh to your little one, but I have 3 little girls ages 3, 7, and 10. Any bad behavior in school which is brought to my attention by the teacher earns them a good old fashioned spanking. Mind you I don't mean a few swats, I am talking about a spanking right out of the 50s pants/underwear down over the lap for a good long time. Better to do in now, before it's to late. SHE NEEDS CONSEQUENCES for breaking rules.
My husband and I feel that if a teacher needs to take time out of their day to deal with our daughters discipline problems we need to put a stop to it ASAP.
Good Luck
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