+ BULLYS and SCHOOL +?
When school first started he didn't want to go and it took us about 3 months to get him to love going and then in December his teacher resigned. The school had his teachers aid take over until they hired a new teacher. Well my son doesn't know if he likes this new teacher and I have my own problems with her too. (I do not to talk about it in front of my son)I will try to talk to her about how my son is doing in school and she will just walk away without even saying a hello. Or if my son is throwing a fit in the hallway before school she won't come out and help me talk to him and calm him down. She's NEVER smiling or laughing with the children in her class. The teachers aid use to help out alot and was always smiling and playing with the children and now the teachers aid has been replaced and that was the one reasons why my son was wanting to go. and now he has a bully in the classroom and he's scared to go to school now. He wants to go to a new school.
Has anyone gone through this before? Please I need any ideas on how to handle this!
Answer:
some teachers are scared of parents and avoid them at all costs. Of course this is really silly but if your teacher is insecure about being criticized (Which doesn't mean she is a bad teacher) she may appear to be rude. Teachers also get alot of flack as alot of people think they know what we do as almost everyone attended school at some time. So this also makes some teachers defensive. Certainly some of my colleagues are.
i teach high school and am a year adviser in Australia in a selective school for the gifted. I don't mind talking to parents as I know their main concern is just to see their child get ahead and perform to their ability.
Can i suggest you make an appointment with your sons teacher to discuss your concerns. If they have such thing as a Head teacher of welfare or similar type person ask if they can sit in on the meeting too.
Before you go along write down your specific concerns which I think appear to be primarily welfare based but also any academic concerns you may have about your sons progress. Ask them how you and they can work together to try to address these issues and you will have to insist on ongoing followups. If you do this they will probably sit up and take notice - Stay calm though as you could alienate the school if you get cross. Good Luck.
talk to the school principal. if you have a problem with the teacher, that's who you report to. and if there is a problem that you are worried about in that classroom, such as a bully, try to talk to his teacher. if that doesn't work, talk to the principal.
i would suggest talking to the principal if the teacher won't listen. every child needs to enjoy school at some level, if you ever expect them to graduate!
Yes, and you need to take this up with the school board. Talking to the principal just doesn't work. If they get enough complaints from other parents, she will be replaced. Good luck.
Schedule a conference with the teacher and principal-at the same time. That is important. Copy this question from you and the answers you get from the Yahoo page. He CANNOT go to a new school. Don't let him bail because it is hard now. Let him watch you problem solve these issues along with the administrator and teacher and let him grow through this. School will be out soon and he will be stronger after this resolution to conflict. Yes, I know, he is only 5, but you need to set the example of how you will handle school problems in the future. He will remember this, I promise.
That is awful, I am sorry to hear that. First of all . that woman shouldn't even be allowed to work in a school. You should report her quick. And I can't believe that there is a bully as young as five now. I thought that was usually in middle school. I live in Georgia and it is against the law to bully other kids. I have kids also that are your sons age and older. You must report this. If all else fails, send him to another school. I hope the little tyke finds his happiness like he deserves. Good luck
I WOULD FIRST TRY TO TALK TO THE PARENTS OF THE BULLY AND THE TEACHER IF THIS DOESN'T WORK TRY THE SCHOOL COUNSELOR THEN THE PRINCIPAL. I WENT THROUGH THE BULLY THING LAST YEAR WITH MY 8 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER I TALKED TO EVEYONE NOTHING HELPED UNTIL I HAD TO RESORT TO GO OVER THEIR HEAD TO THE SCHOOL BOARD ONLY THEN WAS THE BULLY SITUATION TAKEN CARE OF. I FEEL FOR YOUR CHILD.
First scehdule a set time for a meetiing with the teacher. If you don't think she will be co-opertive have the principal sit in. I would also call the parents of the bully if you can. Parents need to know if their kids are a problem.
Public or private you pay for it and you have a right to know what's going on in that class room. The bully needs to be told he cant' bully and needs to have a time out and if he retaliates Then parents should be called if parents are abusive or they do nothing then maybe child protective services. As for your child if the bully is directly bullying your child and he doesn't like his teacher then maybe he should try a different teacher with in the school. His education should come first and foremost. I would try and work it out with the teacher but if nothing is done then ask for a different teacher and take your complaints to the PTA and the school board. Teachers like that shouldn't be teachers.
My friend was told he was a worthless worm and he would go nowhere with his life because he was nothing more than a loser by the principal his senior year, he was expelled for swearing and just being himself. He never hurt anyone never brought weapons to school nothing but this principal had it out for him. I also dealt with this same principal and had I been an in district student you can bet my mom would have had him fired in a heart beat. One of my best friends (and bf at the time of his death) died my junior year and I missed quite a bit of school to go see him in the hospital and I was gone for a week after he died. This guy had the nerve to tell me to get over it and that I was only 17 and didn't know what love was. He was the truest love I have ever found and I have never found another like him. Anyways my point is this teacher should be dealt with...
Oh my Gosh...I was in a similar situation when my kids were in Senior Kindergarden. (they are in Grade One now)
The "permanent teacher" was on pregnancy leave and we didn't even meet her to begin with. That was in Sept. The teacher that they had was quite lax about everything.she was nice, but nothing was ever a problom with my kids, she said. She was sick quite a bit so another teacher came in, and she was great but only there for a short time.
THEN, in May, One month before school gets out, the "permanent teacher" (I'll call her PT) comes back with a VENGENCE!
All of a sudden, my son is this child from HELL and she can't control him and he has "apparent behavioral probloms" where I had never heard anything about from any OTHER teacher. (keeping in mind that the first teacher was quite leaniant) All of a sudden, we need to keep a behavior book on him, he's in time outs all the time..and soon, I find out from other mothers that she's being mean to him. He asks her to help him tie his shoes and she's yelling at him."AND HOW do you ASK?!?" (He's a very polite little boy) and so he's saying "umm..soorrryy??" and she's saying "NO, that's NOT what you say..I"ll TIE them when YOU figure out how to say it nicely!" ( Oh I'm cringing right now!! GRRRRRR) ANyways, He doesn't cry infront of his friends..after 2 weeks of this (imagine, he handled this for 2 WEEKS!) I"m taking them in and doesn't he go and hide around the corner. He's crying. I'm saying, "what's the matter?" And he tells me he doesn't want to go to school...yadda yadda.
That was it. For him to break down infront of his little friends (which most do at some point, but I've never known him to do it and neither have any of the other mothers) I went to the principle. Didn't help much and by that time, it's almost the end of the year...I let it be known that this wouldn't be happening again and he tried to "assure me, Mrs so&so is a wonderful, respected teacher". Well, She's not respected by me and quite a few of the other parents. I also told him that she MUST be the most comepedant teacher in this school since she's the only teacher out of 5 (2 in J.K and 3 in S.K) to point out that he has "behavioral probloms". '
So, even though I went to the principle, it seems that the opinion of the parent really doesn't matter. She's still there. Apparently not as bad as she "used" to be. Maybe having a child of her own has shown her a thing or two.
I was inches away from calling the board of education on her. So I DO understand what you're going through. I would be going straight to that principle. Record every time there is an incident in the classroom with the teacher, with another child. If it's with another child, ask for a meeting with both of them and if it's that bad, then with the parents of the other child as well. We had a bout of bullying with my daughter too and last year, she didn't want to go to school for 2 weeks and we couldn't figure out why when she's always loved it so much. She shook and cried and it broke my heart to have to leave her there but it was the only thing we could do. Eventually, she got over it and went to school without incedent but we never did find out exactly what happened. Juts about scard us to death but another mom had said her little girl (same class) did the same thing and it was another child bullying. But when we asked her she wouldn't tell us. It's so hard. I wish they came with a manual!!
Sorry this was so long..but I DO understnad and don't stop at go sweetie!! o to the board of Education if you don't get the answers that you're looking for!
I hate to say this, and I don't mean it disrespectfully at all, but SCHEDULE a conference with the new teacher. If you're trying to catch a kindergarten teacher when she has a spare moment, you're only kidding yourself. They don't have spare moments. You should also think about how the teacher needs time to adjust (if the original teacher quit in December then this teacher hasn't been there long) and how the students need time to adjust to her as well. In this stage of development, big changes like this are going to mess a kid up. It sucks, but it's not the teacher's fault. Scheduling a conference with her will give you a chance to express your concerns constructively, and it will give HER a chance to explain her teaching methods. Another thing you might want to try, and I could be way off base about this, is dropping him off at the front of the school in the car rider line and NOT at the classroom door. By the time he gets down to the room, he'll most likely have seen a friend from class and will have forgotten that he was upset. Again, I could be off about this, but allowing him some independence in the school environment might help him to adjust better. As for the bully- definitely mention that in the conference. Talk to your son about the importance of telling the teacher when the bully does something mean and unwarranted. Best wishes!
If you have a problem with the teacher then talk to the principal.The teachers are answerable to the boss.Also talk to the principal about the bullying.If this does solve anything then go through your governing council.If your son was moved to another school the bully wins out.I thought of this solution often when my daughter was being bullied in her earlier years but decided that was not the best option.Your son will have many new teachers and people he wont like in his life.Has he got friends that can offer support?He needs friends.Good luck on this one.Please feel free to email me.
if he is still having a fit 4 months into school I think you maybe the problem. New teachers are hard enough but if your son is being a problem you need to sit down and talk to him. Not that I am standing up for the teacher but starting mid stream for a teacher is like starting day one and the kids have to readjust. You need to make an appointment with you and the teacher and your son and see what everyone can do to make the situation better. also try volunteering in the class to make her life easier
The teacher is supposed to answer your questions the best she can, so I'd talk to the principal.
Ok, let me see if I understand this. The teacher's aide who was good is gone now or the aide that wasn't able to talk to ,or wouldn't talk to you is gone now? Oh well if ya got a problem with the new aide I am sure other parents do to so if ya can catch some other parents bringing their kids to school talk to them about the new aide and see if their kids are also having problems with her too. If so then as a group ask to see the principle and the superintendant. If you don't get any satisfaction with them then go to the nex school board mtg. and let them know ahead of time you are coming in with this problem all of you are trying to have resolved with this aide. This will get the matter rolling faster towardbeing resolved. As for this "Bullie"I would give your son a few quick lessons in how to throw a sucker punch to the nose at the same time he steps on the bullie's foot. With the bullie now cryingbecause of his nose being busted along with his instep throbbing your son should be able to go through to at least jr. high without anyone else bullyng him. As his is the only way to get a bully off your back and keep any other kids from trying to bully your son
Gee whiz, this sounds awfully familiar. I remember all too well my son having the most diabolical teacher on the face of the earth. It was Grade 2, year before last!! Poor child was terrified of her, along with every other child in his class. She was a real old sourpuss and extremely rude and snappy with parents and children alike. About 3 months into the year all of a sudden my boy started messing his pants every single day. I just knew in my heart something was wrong but he was so quiet about it and always said nothing was wrong. One day, about 6 months into the year I had just had enough of him coming home wih pants full of mess. I sat him down and tried to gently get him to tell me what on earth was going on? Being the persistent little in your face pest that I can be at times, I was more than a little shocked when he unloaded the whole disgracefull truth on me. Apparently she had been telling him no, he couldn't go to the toilet, that he should have gone 5 - 10 minutes ago when you had lunch, recess or whatever!! Mind you, he was only 7 years old and even I trembled a bit when in her presence. She would tell him no and he had no choice but to mess his pants then and there. Later on, she even denied smelling anything at all! I couldn't believe it. I marched him straight to the Principal's office the next day and unleashed a torrent of pent up stress and shot questions at him with machine gun precision. His responses weren't too rapid, I might add. I was furious, my main argument being that I didn't care if he'd only just walked back into class. He should be allowed to go whenever he needed to!! He's a very intelligent little boy, not one to playing truant, and very conscious of his school work. This was, as I pointed out, information the teacher should be very aware of!! Anways, he (The Principal) and the Teacher went to the toilet when they needed/wanted to didn't they?? Hmmmmmmm, wot a bunch of morons. We ended up in a 4 way meeting with Principal, Teacher, me and my husband. I may be wrong, but it was almost as if this was the complimentary meeting and the real one had already been had. You know, knowing looks between Principal and Teacher, laughing at me and fobbing me off with a flick of his wrist. She of course denied all of my son's allegations and I vehemantly defended my son's honour, especially since 3 of his mates were having the same problem!! Of course the school sided with her, she continued on her merry way of ignorance and frightening small children. Hell hath no fury like a mother scorned.. I had been prepared for this and had previously rung the Education Department and complained before I even spoke to the Principal. They told me to have at least one meeting and if I received no satisfaction to get back to them. 2 meetings later I got back to them and totally buried her, in her own rubbish of course!! 1 week later the Principal range me and told me how upset aforementioned teacher was at all these preposterous allegations I had made and that she really was a nice person. I simply asked him why he was telling me all this as I really wasn't interested in his staff's emotional stability (I suspect she was a rather large consumer of alcohol) and was first and foremost concerned with the welfare of my child, thankyou Sir, Bye! Needless to say, my son had no more problems, the Teacher mysteriously went on holiday for 6 weeks and all was as peacefull as it was ever gonna be, all things being equal.
Sorry it was so long, but how about that one. The lousy rotten mean Teacher, who was also the Bully!!
PEACE & LOVE & ALL THAT
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