If a parent suspects, sex, alcohol, or drugs from a 18 daughter, living at home, should they read her diary?
Answer:
No, reading something she wrote entirely for her will NOT result in good outcome. Not only will she feel hurt and upset that you read her own private thoughts but her rights have been violated and you just broke her trust in you. Hence the word diary. She is 18 and an adult so it's none of your bussiness anymore. The least thing she wants is for parents poking around in her diary. Best interest in heart or not it's wrong and mean for you to read her diary. She'll come to you when she is ready. It's not up to when she will and not for you to force her.
yes
Why the hell don't you just ask
breaking their trust is not good
honest and open
don't meth around
NO! They should re-read their own diary. Children take cues from what they see around. In their homes as well as their friend's homes
Under their roof, play by their rules. Otherwise, move out.
No, here in the states an 18 year old is considered an adult, and the daughter could take her parents to court for invasion of privacy. If they want to know whether their suspicisons have merit they should ASK her.
Better, party with the animal. If she can stay sober longer than the parents, then....what was the question again?
NEVER, read her diary. Talk to her in a peaceful, tactful manner. Speak to her about birth control, condoms, std's, etc.
NO be straight up and ask her. She'll probably deny any use, but mothers usually know best. And if your suspicious then there is probably something going on.
yes, she is still your child. but be ready to intervene
Yes. She is your daughter, and her best interest is at heart. It is your duty to know and do what you must to intervene to help her get her life on track. We had a similar thing recently with my 15 yr old step daughter. We read her notes, and learned a few things. We were able to talk to her in a way that she didn't know we read the notes.
She will feel that her trust has been broken (but so has yours). When you talk to her, if you confess reading her diary, you cannot let the conversation fall into a discussion of her privacy, it has to be about her future, and how what she is doing now compromises her future.
GOOD LUCK.
no you should not read the diary you should let them make there own mistakes and let them get into trouble so they learn from it plus she 18 shes her own person. just lay down some rules if she cant abide by them then show her the door
Nope, how would you like it if she read yours? Give her the same respect that you expect of her. Come right out and ask her about the things that have you concerned. Feel free to make your concerns known, but also respect the fact that she is 18, needs to make a few mistakes, and also needs to be treated the way you would treat your best friends daughter if something happened to your best friend. Get it?
Go ahead but it won't be good . Be sure , it might be the last time you see her for a long time, if at all.
NO. YOU WILL JUST MAKE HER REBEL MORE. tRY AND TALK TO HER- FIND OUT WHAT THE PROBLEM IS. SHE'S NOT DOING IT BECAUSE SHE LIKES IT- THERE HAS TO BE A REASON. NO ONE WANTS TO LIVE THAT LIFE.
It would be a very LAST resort,
it would destroy her trust. I I missed the she is 18 part,
if you think she is using drugs just kick her out.
no, you should kick her out if you think she is doing illegal things in your home. if she wants to do those things, let her be on her own.
Being that she's 18, it's hard to do anything, however they really need to confront her. She needs thier help. Too bad they didn't do something before she was 18.
The daughter is 18 years old, so she is an adult. She is responsible for her choices.
That said, the parents have every right to be sure there are no illegal drugs in the house. They do not want to have to explain to the police how they suspected their daughter was using, but did nothing.
For that reason, I encourage the parents to search for drugs, but not read the diary.
The daughter is not being provided alcohol by the parents, so they are fine there. And she is entitled to have sex, if she so chooses, so there's no conflict or worry.
NO! omg don't ever do that.
that will lose her trust
and it will not be truthful to her or you,
if you do that.
just talk to her about it
Don't read her diary. That will alienate her and make her angry and she could hold it against you forever. You need to come right out and ask her. Technically she is a grown up, but if you are like me you will say "My house, my rules".
What the . . . !? No! Ask them about it and don't be confrontational. Reading the diary is only going to make them do more of what you don't want them to do.
Alcohol - He or she is 18 - it's a part of life. Make sure they know not to drive or get caught.
Sex - make sure he or she knows about protecting themselves.
Drugs - Pit your acceptance of sex and alcohol against this one and say you'll give him or her two out of three.
No. I would never read my child's diary. I had it done to me. I was a good kid, well behaved, never gave my parents cause for worry, yet my mother never trusted me. She found out private things about me that she could have only known from reading my diary. I started writing it in code, and she got really angry at me, and couldn't say why, because then she would have to admit she had been reading it. At 18, your daughter is an adult, and deserving of respect. The fact that she lives at home though, means the respect is a two way road. It's your home, and you have certain rules that must be kept.Talk to her as an adult. Say you are worried about her lifestyle. Lay down the rules; keep it simple; and stick to them. If she does not comply, or want to comply, withdraw privileges. Are you supporting her financially? Then take some thing you are supplying away from her. With MY daughter, i told her the washing machine was mine and so was the television, the computer, the radio, the hot water, etc,if she wanted to do her own thing, then she could do her own laundry, with her own washing powder - you get the picture.
It really depends on the parents, and the child. If you're someone who would explode after finding out the truth, then I think it is better not to. You will end up in a big argument. Although reading her diary is a shortcut, but so what if you find out when you've already suspect her? The best is to just persuade her, console her and teach her of all the steps to take from that onwards...Hope that helps!
Absolutely not! Once trust is violated by the complete invasion of privacy, it is nearly impossible to be fully regained.
If she's 18, she needs to be treated as an 18 year old - - an adult. And if there is a concern about drugs, alcohol, or other issues, they need to be addressed directly.
The most powerful thing in the world is the truth. The truth needs to be upheld. Snooping might sound like a good idea, but all this does is subvert the truth, which ultimately causes resentment.
no she won't trust u anymore...just ask her
NO NO NO that's the first way to loose their trust in you as a parent then they will feel like ain't no way in hell their going to talk to you now because you did that. That can hurt them even if they are doing that talk to them TALK, ASK QUESTIONS, get involved in there life.
As far as if its right or wrong. It's wrong. I seriously doubt she would put those things in there anyway. Just for the fear that her parents might read it.
No you shoud not, She is 18 you should just sit her down and ask her face to face and be straight up.Tell her it is in your best interest
that you suspect that she is doing drugs and
alcohol.And see if your suspicisons are true
and work it out.
GOOD LUCK!
i would try talking first but,if her life is in danger yes i would.
try to talk to her frist or get a drug test. because she wouldnt trust you anymore and if she was getting high or drunk i dont think she would really be writing about it because she would be too out of it to write
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