What is it about children who live in poor families that make them more likely to swear, smoke, steal.?
Now I am not saying that all children from poor families and council estates do these things but it does seem to be more likely.
What factors present in poor families make it more likely for this to happen?
I am asking because I have a below average income and I am raising a family.
Answer:
I grew up in a poor family. I'm not rich either. And my kids are taught ethics. Saying you're more likely to swear, smoke, steal and all the others because you're poor is nothing but simple minded. Look at Hollywood and famous children and tell me who has more ethical problems.
Neither. If you raise your children to appreciate what they have, to respect themselves and others and instill the importance of an education, you'll be fine.
MONEY
Peer pressure
It's the environment they grow up in. I have "rough" neighbours who swear, so their young children also swear. It's what they are used to. My kids don't swear in front of me and their dad cause they do not hear it in the house.
Im not poor but I smoke,drink,been arrested,hated school and been known to swear.I have never stealed but as for the rest yes! So how am I the way I am.I also play golf (not very well) and do a lot of hunting does that please you?
Because some parents shouldnt be parents, they just breed and breed and breed, dont have the money to pay for their children, dont instil disciplin, have poor standards.
Alot of more well off parents have fewer children and higher standards. This is also down to inteligence.
i.e. is it really logical to have children if you are on a low income or no income?
Sadly the poor children grow up and are like their parent, its a vicious circle.
I think it depends on the parenting. I come from a very poor family with less the average income neither me or my sister have ever been to jail we have both been to college and we now both have pretty descent jobs. The reason being my father kept a stick hand on us and made sure that we always felt love and that we never had to feel his hurt of not having enough money or being out of work at Christmas. He taught us right from wrong and kept his foot firm in our butts when needed.
Smoking, drinking, violence, crime can all seem like the normal day to day happenings to a child who is exposed to it on a regular basis. We are what we learn as children & we know no different to our own families, even though we may wish to be something else at times. Even the social circles we grew up in were associated with similar values to our families, so it all seems normal. It's called role modeling.
lets face it, it does depend on the social upbringing of a child that effects its relationship with the world around it and other people.in other words the parents are responsible in most cases for the basic attitudes that a child has about things like work, money, race, religion etc etc etc.
later these may be affected by peer pressure etc but at base level its these initial opinions etc that we all fall back on.
dont get me wrong not everyone from a run down area is a racist, workshy, thieving bast*rd but it is a sterotype for a reason.
although there are plenty of rich folk who could do with a good slap too.lol
Lack of parental guidance . Not all kids from low income end up like that . I was very poor growing up and ended up with an associates degree , i don't smoke or drink or do drugs . I thank my Mom for that . She said that all those vices leads to self destruction . Mind you too that my Mom worked 2 jobs and raised 2 kids herself . She always had time for me and my brother .
alot of the time it's not how or where children are bought up -it's peer presure from the "friends" they meet up with i have 4 children my eldest has skipped school,done drugs, been to prison even gave her children to me -but my other 3 are totaly differant married and hard working but they had a differrant group of friends- you don't know what they are up to when they walk out the front door!
Culture decides success. The "Snoop Dogg culture" will fruit prison. The "liberal culture of death" fruits poverty.
The US census proved that the greatest factor in attaining wealth was how many individuals in the household WORK.
Race has nothing to do with it, as black immigrants do much better than other blacks.
If your raising kids be strict, but understanding. Tolerate NOTHING but the best, and be the parent of your kids not their friend.
Try to be part of society, your community and society and your community will embrace and support you.
Good luck. Hug them kids and make them the most important thing in not only your life but every decision you make.
Best Wishes!
What you are saying is not strictly true as my Sister's children have gone through the swearing thing since 9 years old. Both have done the drinking to excess and one still is to the point of throwing up virtually every time, one has smoked and one was tempted to steal; although thankfully not convicted, that was due to being with the wrong crowd. Basically they are not bad kids but i believe it's the parents fault for one in swearing in front of them. Admittedly the drinking also as they have both seen their parents being sick due to excess alcohol, although the smoking is a mystery unless you could blame me, Sorry forgot to add the parents both have good jobs and are not poor in any sense of the word.
i don't think money is the issue it's about parenting, although the stress of having no money could have an effect on the child.
I dont think it has to do with low income, its more where you live. Peer pressure from kids in the area you live that are slightly older play a factor as younger kids will look up to them.and want to fit in. Plus to be honest bad parenting.people on low income tend to work in low paid jobs, all the hours 24/7 so have little to do with the kids.
The biggest factor is if their parents do those things. I should not worry ; I was a single parent and raised 4 children on a council estate and my income when working was sometimes lower than i would have got on benefits. but i don't smoke, rarely drank (now not at all) and drummed it into my children that they should be honest. they are all grown up now and I am very proud of all of them It is hard work but as long as you do not swear etc they will be fine. remeber that whatever it is you want your childen to be is what you have to be.
I work within this field and my experience has taught me that many of the children have some difficulties because of the culture they are brought up in and the influences they have on their lives - however, this is not restricted to poor families. Many of the poor in terms of finances have a rich life in the way they bring up their children.
There is nothing to teach you how to bring up children - we work with families to enable them to make the best of what they have got - improvements maybe slow in many cases, but the positive outcomes make the work so rewarding - I just wish the Government would put more funding into early intervention work - it works - we can prove it.
I would say its the lack of encouragement. For instance due to the lack of encouragement an attention from parents because the parents priority is to obv keep a roof over their heads by working, the child becomes neglected and thus their energy results in negative behaviour. There is psychological research carried out on this too, if you read up on stress, and also anti-social behaviour.
its not just children who have come from these backgrounds at all, in fact a lot of children who have been brought up properly, with money, and a good education also use drugs, steal, smoke etc, it depends on which path they choose to take when they are older, just take a look at the pratt who entered the big brother house, he was brought up in nice house, good education, money etc, yet hes a complete idiot, who smokes drinks and more than likey takes drugs, he just trying to rebel, hes trying to pretend he came from a rubbish up bringing when in fact he didnt, and also prince harry, now he certainly doesnt come from a poor background, yet he smokes, has taken drugs and drinks
what im trying to say is, you are totally wrong, and you assumption that trouble makers come from estates and are poor is totally wrong!
Its a vicious cycle... Bad/lack of education results in low paid jobs resulting in cheaper/free housing which are generally built in crap overcrowded areas. Low income results in low budgets and this is where the bad nutrition comes in and as most people know bad diet = bad brain function. Bad diet goes hand in hand with lack of exercise and these traits are then passed off as normal to the next generation who think it is acceptable to get free housing and sit on their arses all day eating crisps, cake and drinking coke!
Not being able to get an education.
I think it has more to do with parenting skills then lack of money. Rich or poor , if the parents/care givers, smoke, drink, swear, do drugs...and so on.chances are a child being braught up in that kind of invironment is also going to have a higher chance of doing the same. You can instill great values in your child reguardless of your income.
Peer pressure.If you have on old clothes or old shoes you get talked about.Kids have no one in the family that they can ask for a few dollars so they steal what they want .I use to live from pay check to pay check.My son didn't have what other kids had.He got into fights,and didn't want to go to school.When you live a certain childhood you swear you will never relive it no matter what.I have 3 kids and 2 baby daddies and the 2 fathers don't come around and they don't work.I think no fathers around trigger something.
I was from a council estate, and both of my parents lived off the state. Other kids on the estate were always getting arrested,me:
I am on track for a 2:1 degree in Business Management and im going to do my Master's in HRM!
Hi
Its peer pressure - if the parent of friends do it their children may and you know what kids are like for singling you out if you are different.
I am personally from a massive,rought council est. We were brought up not to swear, go to further education noity to steal etc. It did make us "not fit in" and we all had some degree of bullying at some stage. One of my brothers did go "off the rails" for a bit when he was about 16 but apart from that we all have resonably good jobs, good incomes, own homes, happy relashionships and lovely children and have moved to a "better area" so have done ok.
Its a fine line between bringing kids up well and makingh them stick out like sore thumbs!
i grew up on a council estate in birmingham.
from my experience what motivated me not to go down that path was watching my step dad drink so much he wet himself and eventually went to prision for drinking offences.
and another was my mum just having one baby after another and not actually working ever. my step- dad was th same he hardly worked. i just didnt want a life like that
i left home at 15 and put myself through college and uni (i did apply for benefits though as i was under 18 and wanted to finish my courses)
most of the time though it can be drink and drugs that push a person to this.
lack of money and just not being able to be like the people they look up to.
this can lead to in some cases depression or rebellion.
if you and ur partner work u are half way to avoiding this. as u are showing your children the importance of earning your own money and living a 'free' life where you dont have to sign on every 2 wks and prove u have got off your butt and looked for a job. ( the job centre where i grew up put me off claiming jsa as there were really rough looking people outside that stank of beer!)
good parenting is all you can do. but then again if i stayed at home i would never have went to uni and i would probably have a criminal record because of the lifestyle and the people my parents knew..
i have my first on the way still considered young though at 22 but i have my education now and a small business doing paintings and illustrations i dont make much but i enjoy it and im happy.
Because you are even asking this question, seems like your kids won't have that problem. You are a conscientious parent who cares about your kids' wellbeing, education and career choices.
Good luck!
You are definitely right that not all children from poor families are doing these things. If you find yourself in a situation like this, you can do what my mother did. She "isolated" us from the entire communitiy. Alot of smart families are doing this. What I mean by this is that when you send your children to school, they are not allowed to associate themselves with anybody but their teachers. They are not allowed to play outside, because the children outside are more likely to influence yours. They are basically not allowed to associate with anyone but eachother. If they want to go to the park, you take them, and spend time with them. Continue to do this, and you will see the difference. Constantly tell them to hold their head up, and soon, you will get away from such an unhealthy community, so that they can make themselves somebody. My mother has four children, and when she did this, we didn't like it, but we still listened, because we were her children(there were four of us). Now, we all graduated from college, and I am going to medical school to become a dermatologist. I thank her for everything that she has done for me.
I was single mom for 4 years. My kids were 6, 8 & 11..their father worked odd hours & he wouldn't help me much. I often worked 12-16 hours a day to make ends meet.
In my experience, it was me working so much & the lack of a GOOD, STRONG male role model. I am proud to say that with my father's help & now my husband's, my boys are on the right track & have grown into nice young men!
no respect for others, no manners,no belief in themselves or ot5hers, anyway i brought my kids up in a council house, as a one parent family they never skipped school went onto collage and have always had very good jobs and treat people with respect. it's the parents who don't work get drunk leave there kids alone all the time,throw rubbish on the ground and clump there children that set bad examples to them,
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