18, pregnant so confused! Any advice?
Answer:
First of all I just wanted to say that you CAN do this! Second your ex sounds like a real piece of trash! If he doesn't want to be in the child's life then fine your both better off with out him. You can always take him to court thou after the baby is born to get child support that would be up to you.
Third your new boyfriend sound great! He's a keeper. Why would you think it would be wrong to want him to stay with you. If he's okay with everything and wants to be with you be happy about it.
just raise your baby and move on if he doesnt want nothing to do with you baby then f u c k him... and start a life with some one whos going to love you and yours. good luck!
Hey listen forget him move on with your life! But if you do not want the baby then give him / her to me b/c my hubby n I can not concieve a baby and we have been tryn and I will be more than happy to take him / her off you hands PLEASE you will save my relationship! Call me if anything 407 272 5422 La'Tasha
No, your not being stingy. If he loves you, it wont really matter to him. Just move on past the old BF, and enjoy life with the new.
if the new bf cares for you and is such a great guy like you say then he will stay with you and help you raise the baby. talk to him and make sure thats what he wants and if he's willing to do so then let him and forget about the "sperm donor" he sounds like a jerk anyway. good luck
I don't understand -- how do you know whose baby it is if you have been with two men in a short timeframe?
If you are SURE that its your x-bf's baby, then put his name on the birth certificate and start the proceedings to seek child support starting immediately. You will need this money to help raise your baby.
You can' t make someone stay with you who doesn't want to just because you are pregnant. And if he acts like a jerk toward you, then he won't be much help to live with anyway, even if he is the baby's father.
But the baby's father IS legally required to pay for child support until the baby is 18. You can start the proceedings before the baby is born, so that you can start collecting from him as soon as the baby arrives.
Don't depend on a man for anything! You know what you gotta do take care of your baby and yourself. After the baby take the father to domestics and get child support.
I don't think your being stingy if you really like the guy and hes willing to help you out with the baby go for it follow your heart thats what my mom always told me
Your boyfriend that most "overlook" may be a diamond in the rough. A strong guy from how it sounds! Kudos to him for not running. For the baby's father that is trying to run, he's gonna have to face up to this one day anyway. Weather or not you have him around is your decision, but a child has the right to know both parents. Sounds like he's afraid of being judged since he got you pregnant. He's wanting to hide that this is his baby for some reason. You can have a paternity test done to prove he's the father then he cant dispute it, and will then be responsible for his share of the financial issues. Good luck to ya!
Congrats on the baby!!
First of all, congratulations, even though you may not feel so blessed at the moment, their is a reason for you to have this baby. The father of the child needs to be more responsible, and help take care and pay for the costs of having this child one way or another court ordered or by just stepping up and being and adult. However if you feel it is too much a waste of energy, and time and that he will ignore the responsibility either way then focus you energy on finding help to pay for the costs. If he was proabortion, then he probably won't be very helpful, so I would just start to find other options of financial support for young mothers.
You aren't stingy for asking your current boyfreind to stick with you, however if he does leave you have to realize if he stays he is also taking on that he should not be expected to take on the added responsibility of a child by force, but by choice and out of love.
Finally you don't need a man to help you, but it is wonderful if either one decides to step up and help . You can do this, and there are tons of resources for young mothers out there.
No u r not being stingy at all. If he is not going to help u raise the baby tell him that he will have to pay child support. That is all there is to it. It is not his business to tell u that u cant tell anyone that the baby is his. And get FULL custody of the child when you have him/her. PLEASE NO ABORTION!! HTH! (Hope This Helps)
Oh that is the exact thing is happening to me as we speak. Does his family like you? Bcuz my ex's family likes me more than they like him so, its good in that area. But my ex isn't pro abortion, he's pro adoption, which I also don't like. My ex has also been a jerk with me and hasn't even offered to help. My advice: Go with the new boyfriend. If he's willing to be there for you, and help, then he should be the one that baby calls Daddy. As for your ex, if you decide on the child support thing, he also gets rights to the child. If you want him to stay away like I do, don't even put his name on the birth certificate. If you do, he has every right to that child and the whole situation will confuse the baby as it gets older. If he's not going to be around and is going to continue to treat you like crap then I'd suggest you do it that way. Don't let it stress you, its not good for the baby. Hope that helps.
If he is good enough for you and your precious baby he will stay. If he's not he'll walk and your life will be the better for it. I was a teen mom, too, so I understand a bit of what you're going through.
First, I would contact your states attorneys office so they can go after your ex for child support. They were a huge help to me!
Second, stay happy! You have your whole life ahead of you! Even with a baby there is so much to look forward to! You can get financial aid to help you go to college, and accomplish all you have dreamed for your life.
Now, about the guy thing. Men will come and go until you find the one God has intended for you. DO NOT SETTLE because of wanting a father for your baby! Wait for the right man to come along, who will think of your son as his own. Maybe the guy you are with will be like this, but maybe he won't.
My husband never even called my son his stepson. He always called him his son. His parents never called my son "Meg's son". They called him their grandchild. Hold out for a man like that with a family like that. It is worth the wait!
i was 6 wks preg. when i might a great but not hot or skinny. but he took care of me i worked also, his family took me in and his mom helped name her. now we have broke up, but he still hangs out w/my 7 year old. my daughters father took a couple years but now he's a great dad and he's apart of her life! i say he's a keeper, and give the sperm donor some time, maybe he'll come around.
Well see my cousin had this delima to. First off you should make sure that you have the means take care of this child, and that you have some type of family members that can help you, cuz it will get rough. if you then decide to go with it and have it. you need to ask your ex. if he is going to be there or if he isn't and don't let him fool you. cause if he is asking you not to tell any one that this is his child he more or less doesn't want anything to do with it. so you might have to do this on your own. and if you boyfriend now doesn't mind being there with you through this, all the better. but remember there will be time when you think thats you can't do it anymore, or you feel like you don't want the child any more. in those time you should talk to someone really special to you. to help see you through it. but one you have the child. it's and experince that you wouldn't trade to the world for.
yeah if the ex wants to act like an *** about it all...move on u dont need him around...when the baby is born get him for childsupport good luck w/.everything
Look if the new boyfriend is already okay with it then I would stay with him. Even if he knows that it's not his baby he maybe the kind of man that will still treat it like it's his. Don't worry about the ex until the baby is born then if he is one of them men that says his not the daddy then go get a DNA test prove it to him then take him to court to make him pay child support! That is about the best advice I can give to you! Good luck!
Mistakes happend .Now you are pregnant at so young age I want to remind you that a baby an innocent creature can be very joyful but again too much responsabilite ..I dont know how far you are but you need to start organizing your time for him...and if I was you, just forget the biologiqul father help because I dont think he will help...but do something in writing right now because if you keeping the baby and taking completley care of him now you dont want a jerk like your x to came one day and demanding his rights..he can have them now by sharing all the responsabilite or forget about them forever.And enjoy your boyfriend if he is good for your baby ..after all we have seen so much poeple with more kids that have found happiness with other man ...why not you? beside at stage is almost like it was his..Dont be confused and start preparing for the little bundle of joy that will change your young life forever.
Well see my cousin had this delima to. First off you should make sure that you have the means take care of this child, and that you have some type of family members that can help you, cuz it will get rough. if you then decide to go with it and have it. you need to ask your ex. if he is going to be there or if he isn't and don't let him fool you. cause if he is asking you not to tell any one that this is his child he more or less doesn't want anything to do with it. so you might have to do this on your own. and if you boyfriend now doesn't mind being there with you through this, all the better. but remember there will be time when you think thats you can't do it anymore, or you feel like you don't want the child any more. in those time you should talk to someone really special to you. to help see you through it. but one you have the child. it's and experince that you wouldn't trade to the world for.
im kinda going thru the same thing, my ex doesnt want anything to do with the baby when he is born. my ex moved out of the state and i dont need the help from him so im not going to go thru with child support. i was seeing a new guy when i found out i was pregnant and i didnt tell him that i was pregnant, i was scared he was going to leave me but he cheated on me so it didnt matter if i told him or not. if your new man is still with you he prolly wants to help you out. i think now that it doesnt matter about if your having a child with someone else its the feelings you feel for each other.
do you have parents you can talk to
if this guy is willing to care for the baby as it was his then accept it
U r most definitely not being stingy for asking him to stay with u. He is staying with u cos he obviously feels very deep for u and wants to stand by u through thick and thin. As for ur ex, if he doesnt want to play a role in ur babys life u cant force him too. It may be 1/2 his responsibility but you would be better without him there at all if he only wats to be apart of ur babys life when he wants to b. Im not saying it in a mean way but truthfully u dont wat guy like that in ur life and ur babys life because it will only cause fights, bring trouble and confuse ur baby when he/she grows older. If you have some1 willing to love u n the baby, support u and stick by your side (it doesnt neccessarily mean a guy, could be ur mum or family!) you then u dont need ur ex to help (remember there r tons of woman who do this alone). Although he mite be the biologicle father he doesnt hav to b apart of ur babys life. REMEMBER he doesnt even want ppl to know that the baby is his! Now y should the baby hav a father that isnt even proud enough to let ppl no thathe/she is theirs. This baby is a gift not a burden! The baby deserves better than that and so do u.
And as for ur age, dont worry. I know it might sound scary to have a baby at ur age but it willonly get better as ur pregnancy goes on. At times u will hav ups n downs but that is all totally normal, its all part of ur pregnancy. But wen the day ur baby is born it will be the happiest day of ur life. Trust me. I am 19 yrs old and i hav a 7month baby boy.I got pregnant wen i was 18 and it was scary at the beginning not knowing what to expect, but once u start buying baby cloths for them and reading up on pregnancy and wat 2 expect IT ONLY GETS BETTER! : ) Sorry 4 making this so long :p and i hope i helped a little bit! Take care.
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