I always wanted to be a mum so why am I so unhappy?
I'm getting no joy out of being with him & I feel like I just wanna curl up in a ball & cry. I catch myself telling him off for just being a normal toddler. I don't know why I'm doing this. He only sees his dad for an hour or so in the eves cos dad works a lot so all he really has is me.
How can I stop being like this, I feel so bad I know I'm not a good mum I don't need to be told that I just need to know why I'm being so impatient & moody when I have such an adorable little boy, he deserves so much better
Answer:
my life is exactly the same way except during the hour my son sees his dad he is in such a bad mood that all he does is fight with me so we enjoy no family time. i finally went to the doctor and they diagnosed me with depression i have had a mild case since i was a teen but it got worse when i had my son with postpartum and all then when he became a toddler all i did was yell at him for nothing, no you are not a bad mother dont think that way. your son is still alive and living in your home with you so you are not a bad mother do not listen to those who say you are my advice is that you go to your local free clinic or your family doctor and ask for a depression quiz they will tell you what kind of medicine you should take it takes about a week to start working but after that you will see a big change you are more energetic it can help you lose weight and you will feel better about your parenting and you will enjoy the time you spend with your son God Bless! email me if you neeed anything
U just need time away from him & you'll be fine it's normal
Sounds like you are depressed..
Having hormonal problems ?
What has changed in your life ?
It sounds like you might have post-partum depression. If you want you could read up on it, but I also definitely recommend for you to talk to a professional about this. It might seem that it doesn't help, but you'll find that it'll help you alot.
YOU NEED TO QUIT SAYING YOUR A BAD MOM EVERY MOM HAS BAD DAYS WHEN WE FEEL OR SAY THINGS WE REGRET YOU NEED A BREAK ASK A FRIEND TO WATCH HIM FOR HALF A DAY OR FIND A DROP IN DAY CARE NOT MY FAVORITE BUT A FEW HRS WON'T HURT HIM AND HE MAY JUST HAVE SOME FUN ! TELL DAD HOW YOU ARE FEELING AND ASK FOR A MOM DAY! GOOD LUCK YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS! PRAYER HELPS TOO! BUT PUT YOUR MIND AT EASE YOU ARE JUST A NORMAL TIRED MUM
You are a good mom, otherwise this wouldn't be eating at you. Find a playgroup to join so he can play with other children while you get some much needed conversation with other mom's going through the same stage. On weekends make sure he has daddy time while you get a break and get out of the house. And try not to stay home all day either, make sure you two have plenty of time out and about so you don't sit at home where the housework and the confined space can add to your stress. I enrolled in "mommy and Me" classes through our community center and technical college and took art and activity classes through our parks department to help distract myself from the stay at home mom stress.
what do you mean telling him off... that is not cool at all. you need some self control and maybe a break. get a babysitter and take some time for yourself. pamper yourself for a weekend and use the time to evaluate some of the reasons why you feel so frustrated.
I think we all have a reservoir of patience and good will towards our children that inevitably runs dry and needs to be replenished from time to time. It's incredibly difficult and taxing to spend all waking hours caring for a toddler. You need to get your husband to take him or find a sitter and spend some time on yourself. Go to the gym or meet friends for lunch. I suspect that the whole time away from him that you'll really miss him and will be much more understanding and relaxed when you "reunite." Your love for him shows in your question, so don't give up on yourself. Good luck
I have 3 kids my son is almost 1, my daughter's are 4 and 14..i know its hard...but hang in there.if it gets too bad you might need to get someone to watch him for a bit while you take a break...Also if you feel your out of control..there may be something else wrong...you may be experiencing depression or something worse.GOOD LUCK!! and take care.
it is a normal stage. moms go through stages of development, too. you do need time to yourself. you don't want to send your son away, but do you have activities where you sit and talk with moms and watch the kids play - even when they're too young for anything but parallel play? do you take him to things you like to do - museums, movies, parks, beaches, extravangances maybe that treat you while entertaining him.
i know your despair about him deserving better. over the 14 years with my two sons, i have despaired a few times that they are not getting the mother they deserve. however, when we are human and teach them how to strive for our bests while taking care of our needs (not to the exclusion of their needs) and accepting our flaws, we are giving them a good enough mother.
don't let yourself get trapped by this depressive style thinking, then. fight it with logical contradictions or by acting differently or you can find yourself actually depressed.
Aww how old is your son? It might be remnants of post-partum if he's still very young, though I hope that's really not the case. You could also be just stressing out in general,and since you're always with your son, he becomes the reason why you're like that. You might need some alone time to just relax and clear your mind.
It's good that you are aware that you are impatient, and that he deserves more than that. All I can say is, that's just a phase. You're his mother, you should accept him for who he is, no matter how irritating he can get. As you said, his father is barely around, so he NEEDS you. I would feel hurt if my mom kept staying away from me, and does not enjoy any time we spend together. Don't let him think that there's something wrong with him. Wishing you all the best for you and your family! :)
I think it is depression and you need to put time aside for yourself. But please know that every parent feels this way at some time or another. Or at least I have. I think you should also discuss your feelings with your husband and ask him to give you some time in the evenings. Good luck..
I can relate to this BIG TIME! I, too, am a full-time stay-at-home Mom; however, I do live in the city. I am with my 15 month old girl all day long and my husband sees her for about 1 - 2 hours a day, during the week, before she goes off into dreamland.
What keeps me sane is going for a drive. Do you have a car? Stroller that you could go for a walk? You had mentioned that you're in the country/rural area. Have you introduced yourself to your neighbors? You never know...they just may be new parents as well or offer to babysit for you so you can just relax, without the baby for awhile. If you don't feel better soon and still have a lot of anger and depression, see your doctor. There's low dose medication for this.
You might want to speak with your doctor about it. It does sound likeit may be depression and your doctor can help. I wish you the best of luck. I can tell from reading your post that you love your child. Just remember, your his mom and he loves you. Talk to your doctor and he or she will help you through this.
u need some Mommy time
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