How do I handle my whiney 2 year old??
Answer:
Ignore her when she whines and don't answer her until she can speak in a normal tone of voice.
There's hope, but it will take some time. Let her know that whining is no longer acceptable and if she can't talk to you like a little girl she needs to spend some time in her room or time-out. Only place her in the room one minute per year of age. You can also try to take things from her, like if it's over a toy, take the toy and put it away until she can settle down. When she sees the cause-and-effect method whenever she whines, she'll stop doing it. I wouldn't expect it to work overnight, though. It could take weeks or even a few months before it stops.
There is hope: but remember you created that MONSTER!. when you tell her know mean it that is your saving grace good luck.
There's hope. Take her aside, and say "We've made a new rule!" The rule is: from now on, any whining will mean she has to go to her room until she can talk to you properly. When she starts, interrupt and say, "Uh, oh. That's whining. We have a new rule now! To your room until you can talk to me properly." Then send her, even if she SAYS she's going to start talking properly. (She'll only need to stay for about 2 minutes.) You'll probably need to stand outside the door, but it shouldn't take too many times before you start to notice a difference.
For us, having a sense of humor got us through the whiny phase.
Our daughter has four basic rules, which she can recite like a catechism:
1) NO WHINING.
2) Don't feed the alligators. (Everyone needs one rule they won't ever break, right?)
3) No hitting, biting, kicking, scratching, or pushing.
4) No going in the street--EVER--without holding a grown-up's hand.
So when she whines, our absolute first response, said with a smile, is, "What's the number one rule?"
We also told our daughter that we couldn't see her or hear her when she whined. Sometimes we'd even throw a light blanket over her, and walk around saying, "Where is Phoebe? She was just here a second ago, but now I can't find her..." And then when she laughed and asked for whatever it was that she'd been whining about in a normal tone of voice, we'd overexaggerate: "OH! Is THAT what you wanted? I had no idea!"
We'd also tease (gently) about her being a big fakey faker for fussing over nothing.
Or we'd do the whole, "Phoebe, don't smile! Definitely don't laugh. That would blow your whole cover. Don't smile!" And, of course, she wouldn't be able to keep a straight face. And then we could swoop in and distract her or redirect her or whatever.
It makes her laugh, and it helps you keep your sanity.
When pushed beyond all human limitations, we would ask her, "Are you the center of the universe?" And she would always say, "No..." So now we can joke around about that, too. "Should I drop everything I'm doing to cater to the center of the universe?"
Good luck.
When my 5th child, now four year old was two and she whined like that, I mocked her and it really piturbed her. Eventually she stopped. We are annoyed by their whining and they are even more annoyed by our whining because we are much bigger. Children allow us to relive childhood again at some point. Enjoy it while you can. When they grow up, you' ll wish you had the whining!
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